How Much Pain Do You Need to Feel

The Good Kind of Chaos

2024-09-04T01:50:22Z

This was all last minute, not that Rekker had intended that. He had decided to donate to the Paralympics this year, having his students, and Raev, and now Dee around had influenced his choice. Of course, they had then asked him to fly in to Paris for the opening of the games, to encourage and do a speech or something. He had been discussing logistics with Tom when Dee came up. From there, it was mostly a blur. Dee's interest, Ziggy's interest, the original invite turning to looking for a band to open.

Now, they were stepping into Stade de France. He glanced at Ziggy who looked unphased by any of this. Rekker had no idea how the Anthean was so stable right now. He glanced at the others and saw the whole range of emotions one could imagine. The ginger was feeling the pressure because he was in charge of all of this. Tom had the foresight to send Martyn along. His brother was there with him as they walked toward the stage. It was incredibly early in the day and they needed to get to the stage, learn cues, and find out the day schedule among a million other things that were starting to overwhelm the guitarist. He was shouldering getting the stage set up. The others had some time to do their own thing before they would be called up on the stage to play.

Eventually, Rekker and Martyn would return. For now, Ziggy and the others were in the dressing room. They needed the time to get stage ready, rehearse the song, and for some, deal with the nerves of an international recording of their performance. Ziggy prepared to be moral support while he dressed and is thankful to see Rekker ensured everyone's comfort foods had been laid out. Even Ziggy felt the long flight, long drive, and shorter than usual night of sleep and rest. Maybe some would end up napping in the two hours they had before they went on stage.

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Close of a Stadium Show

2023-08-09T17:37:25Z

For "what are we?" moments #16 accidentally referencing them as "my"
Prompted by the fact that this and this exist

( Curses and Lightning )

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You're acting like a child.

2023-02-14T17:41:15Z

For 101 Ways to Say I love you #1 "You don't have to do this alone."

( A bitch in the parking lot )

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Brother's Breakfast.

2023-01-13T07:12:46Z

For Casual Affection prompt 21. laughing at their jokes

( Three together )

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Gratitude isn't always enough

2023-01-06T04:02:14Z

3. Gratitude for something small.
A few weeks following this <-- Trigger warning for mental health

( Happiness for once )

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Breakdown

2022-12-01T19:03:53Z

For Nexus prompt: 1. "You're still here, despite everything."

( Cut TW: Self Harm and Mental Health )

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Brotherly Harassment

2022-08-20T17:28:44Z

For Writer's Month 2022 Day 13: Fairy Realm

( Happy Birthday Brother )

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Opportunities

2022-08-14T20:34:07Z

For Writer's Month Day 10: Kiss

( No WAY! )

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Broken down

2022-08-09T20:05:28Z

Writer’s Month 2022: Day 8: Enemies to Lovers

Rekker felt like he'd been hit by a truck when his eyes opened. It left him groaning from aches and the pounding in his head. One thing was for sure, he'd drank too much the night before but that didn't explain why his body was hurting, the burning on his forearms especially. Rubbing his eyes he rolled onto his back, or tried to. There was someone in his bed with him. For a moment he couldn't remember who was there and then he heard the sleepy grouching.

The Brit froze and got wide-eyed. The last time he'd seen this Swede they'd fought until they were in tears and screaming at each other. His mind slowly came around to the previous day and night. He hated the pale haired Swede. Even yesterday he remembered fighting in the elevator until they were both sunk to the floor having meltdowns. This was a new low in his life, bringing an enemy into his house, into his bed.

He shifted when he realized he was naked. They were both naked. He covered his whole face with his hands as he realized what the scratches on his arms and the aching meant. Rekker wanted to get up and run but the groaning beside him turned into mumbles as the Swede curled up beside him. He felt the arm slip around his chest and the face nuzzling into his hair and neck.

Mentally he hated the singer. He hated the way he screamed and demanded and drove Rekker over the edge mentally. There was a real fear that the singer would trigger him so badly he'd end his life. He had felt that briefly both times they fought and could only imagine it would happen again.

All of that aside, the way the singer clung to him in his sleep felt so good. His soft skin and the way he kept pressing in closer. Rekker cracked and wrapped his arms around the thinner Swede. He hated him so deeply but the way their bodies fit, the way his felt there beside him. The brit sighed heavily and turned over to face the Swede, closing his eyes and wrapping his arms around him. Bjorn pressed in and buried himself in the embrace. Rekker gave up in that moment and decided to risk his mental health and survival for the whisper in his heart that said he didn't hate this singer.

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Going to California

2022-08-04T13:56:21Z

For Writer’s Month 2022 Day 1: Beach

Rekker had seen the ocean many times and the English Channel but there was something about this place. Malbu he thought he had heard his girlfriend call it, Topanga Beach. The sun was setting and everything looked golden. He couldn't shake the calm that came over him as he walked across the sand toward the water.

“You look like the day I saw you down at the bus stop.”

Rekker finally pulled his eyes away to see Missy standing beside him laughing. She laughed so easily, something that he never quite got the handle of ever. Unless it was a cynical sort of laughter that was different. She could pull a smile from him though and that was part of why he loved her. Sure, Missy was probably the most beautiful woman on the beach but Rekker felt her more than seeing her some times.

“The flies are going to get in.” She teased.

“What?” Rekker stared at the woman and the broke into one of his faltering smiles as she pushed her fingers under his chin.

“Nevermind.” She shook her head as she slipped off the bathing suit cover. “We still have about an hour to swim.”

Rekker didn't need more than that word. Swimming soothed his soul since the time he was a child and hated everything else. He had fond memories of Robert getting him away from everyone to spend some time in the waves.

He pulled his shoes off and tossed him into the car. Missy came up and ruffled all of his hair into a mess then ran for the water. That smile broke out again as he took off after her across the warm sand. If nowhere else in the world this is where he felt at home, where he could escape his constant depression.

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Never Any Peace

2022-07-14T14:20:10Z

For "What are we?" 1. prompt sparks when skin brushes skin

( a little NSFW )

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It's a Nightmare and Exactly What I Want

2022-06-10T10:59:50Z

For Nexus Prompt 4. A sudden upheaval.

( You Can't Ask Me to Do This )

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Consequences

2022-06-02T11:35:51Z

Note: Linked threads, prompt, and replies deal with homophobia, violence, mental health collapse, and other subjects that might be triggering to some.

For Nexus prompt 5. "Everyone chooses which mask to show the world. What's beneath yours?"
Related to this thread and the Follow up thread(Potentially NSFW)

( My Mind is Like a Freight Train )

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Better Watch What You Ask for...

2022-05-10T20:54:43Z

( A little Q&A )

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A Picture is a Thousand Shards of Glass

2022-05-10T20:25:08Z

For 100 Ways to Say I Love You 69. "This is my favorite picture of us."

Trigger warning for Suicidal ideation and attempted suicide.

( Death is calling me )

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On tour

2022-04-24T12:45:16Z

For Casual Affection 11. calling them nicknames

( At the Back Window )

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Never a Moment of Peace

2022-03-06T20:28:03Z

For SMUT prompt 17) “When I get home, I expect you to be undressed and waiting on all fours for me.”

( Day at the Studio )

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What am I doing with my life?

2022-02-14T21:36:50Z

101 Ways to say I love you 54. "No one has ever made me feel like this."

( Time for a Panic Attack )

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What do you mean, snow?

2022-01-27T02:31:19Z

For Nexus prompt 5. "Wait, hang on. Did you say snow day?"

( Not in L.A. )

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What are we, 16?

2022-01-10T16:26:06Z

For Smut Prompt: 89)“Just pull the car over!”

( cut for NSFW )

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What a Mess!

2021-12-31T03:27:59Z

Ways to say I love you 74: "I saw that you were almost out of shampoo, so I went and got some for you."

( Do you love me? )

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Do You Want Bitten?

2021-12-29T19:03:49Z

Smut prompt #34. "I love the sounds you make when you come undone.”

( NWS beyond this cut )

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Last Days In L.A.

2021-12-22T17:37:30Z

( Sleeping In )

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Say that again.....

2021-12-14T02:04:09Z

( cut for slurs and violence )

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Hungover and Cat Napping

2021-10-24T15:04:51Z

For 101 Ways to Say I Love You #32 "Go back to sleep, (term of endearment)."

( Good Morning, Babe )

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