"Yeah, I know how easy it is just to say fuck it all and end it because you don't even know how to think like a normal person anymore, whatever the fuck normal is."
Hans sighed and realised it felt good to talk with someone that had been there. Died and came back again. The Swede hadn't even known just how close to death he'd actually been but it was pretty fucking close. Hunter had explained this to him back at the hospital briefly before he walked away and got on with his life.
"Devon sounds like a rock. Someone to hold onto when everything goes to shit."
"It's not your fault your body is telling you to do things like that. There isn't such a thing as normal anyway, at least I don't think so. Social norms were what drove me to commit suicide."
Hans nodded, understanding about Devon wanting to be alone and brood because the Swede was guilty of that too. Hunter often coming to find Hans when he was alone and including him in conversation and passing the guitarist a soda. The singer was such a mother hen it warmed his heart.
"Being lonely isn't fun but it helps when you have caring band members around with you. I sometimes get told I sleep with my guitar and have my head buried inside of it."
"It's really fucked that I can tell the social norms to fuck off and then my own mind tells me to die and I want to listen." It wasn't exactly that black and white but it was as good of an explanation as any.
Rekker shrugged at Hans. "I like being alone. I don't like people in my house or space."
In general, that was true. Bjorn, in Rekker's mind was now part of his living space in an odd way. It wasn't that he didn't see the singer as a person, he definitely saw him as an incredible person, but that he was not an outside person. Hexed fell into that same strange void, so did Robert. Most people though, Rekker didn't want them around at all.
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rage_rekker) wrote2021-08-11 04:17 am
Re: For Hans
Hans sighed and realised it felt good to talk with someone that had been there. Died and came back again. The Swede hadn't even known just how close to death he'd actually been but it was pretty fucking close. Hunter had explained this to him back at the hospital briefly before he walked away and got on with his life.
"Devon sounds like a rock. Someone to hold onto when everything goes to shit."
no subject
It did feel oddly good but Rekker knew to be careful because his own dark went way far down into the abyss.
"He is but I know some of it is learned. He's a shithead about it but we check in on him too. He gets lonely and broods sometimes."
no subject
Hans nodded, understanding about Devon wanting to be alone and brood because the Swede was guilty of that too. Hunter often coming to find Hans when he was alone and including him in conversation and passing the guitarist a soda. The singer was such a mother hen it warmed his heart.
"Being lonely isn't fun but it helps when you have caring band members around with you. I sometimes get told I sleep with my guitar and have my head buried inside of it."
no subject
Rekker shrugged at Hans. "I like being alone. I don't like people in my house or space."
In general, that was true. Bjorn, in Rekker's mind was now part of his living space in an odd way. It wasn't that he didn't see the singer as a person, he definitely saw him as an incredible person, but that he was not an outside person. Hexed fell into that same strange void, so did Robert. Most people though, Rekker didn't want them around at all.