Rekker nodded his agreement. "Those changes and my adrenaline seeking nature can get dangerous. I like the feeling of thinking I might die if I do something."

Thankfully, Rekker had found healthy outlets like surfing, skydiving, being on stage, racing and some other less than deadly activities. That didn't always work but he was mostly stable with his usual outlets, therapy, and medication, mostly anyway.

"I'm a slicer." Rekker admitted which was why he often wore long sleeves to hide all the scars. "I don't keep knives or razors or anything in the house and tell restaurants to take them off the tables." Or realistically, one of his companions remembered to tell them. "I'm a wrench in some studies since I am an anxiety ridden, self-loathing, uninhibited, thrill-seeking, major depressive with suicidal ideation. I probably have all the malfunctions."

And that was a bit of his self-loathing slipping in, believing he was broken. Even though he was doing better he still felt like he was a mess in ways humans shouldn't be.